Beat you to it

I wouldn't be surprised if we are posting at the same time right now, since that has happened before, but this isn't really your normal time of day to post, so I think we're good. Also, too much posting is a problem I can definitely handle, so I'm not worried.

Thank you for all the helpful and constructive feedback on my publishing thoughts. I realized last week how much I love being able to put my problems and conflicts in here and talk to you about them. I end up approaching them more constructively in the first place and I get healthy responses, so that's nice too. I realized this on the bus on the way to the subway into the city last week. I was about 10 minutes from my house and realized I forgot my camera. I got so upset and even thought about going back, but I didn't want to be late for the RandomHouse thing. I thought of texting my mom, since I often want to do that when something is upsetting me. I guess I just get overwhelmed when I'm mad at myself for a stupid little things like that and telling someone at least gets it off your chest. But I find that telling my mom doesn't usually help because a. she has a tendency to take empathy to the next level, for example she would start by saying I'm sorry, that really sucks, and then scenarios will occur to her in which I could have used the camera and I'll feel worse. "Oh, that's a shame that you can't take ballet pictures!" and b. It kind of makes me revert to a childhood reaction to it rather than just taking a deep breath, saying that's not the reason I'm going there, and it's really not a big deal anyway.

The point is that in thinking about this, I stopped myself from texting my mom and thought instead about how I would write about it in here and what you would say about it, and I just realized how great Bowl is and how lucky I am to have it. The truth is, I had this image of taking St. Louis pictures for a potential blog since it's just another place I've been, and I realized it wasn't like I'd be going to the Arch and doing touristy things to take pictures of anyway. I was going to help out with my sister and it's a damn good thing I did. She wasn't really feeling well all of last week on and off so I was helping with Hannah. Then Thursday night, it got really bad and they decided to go to the Emergency Room. So it was good I was there to babysit while Hannah went to sleep. Then they admitted Sabrina to the hospital. Apparently, she had a gall stone stuck in her duct even after the gall bladder was removed. So, this was causing her liver enzyme levels to get really high or whatever. The doctors told her that normal levels are around 30-40 and hers were around 1000. I have no idea what this means, but when you look at the relative numbers, it seems like a pretty big deal.

So anyway, it's a relatively simple procedure to remove it, but they couldn't do it until Friday. Then they told her friday morning that they had a busy schedule and weren't expecting her so she would have to wait until late afternoon. So I took care of Hannah and Shabbos food while Max was with her. She ended up having to stay until Saturday morning and was discharged and is feeling much better now, which is a relief both health-wise and because I love Hannah, but I am exhausted.

So long story short, good thing I'm here. I haven't had much time or energy to write, so the second half of the month is going to be intense if I decide to continue. But they keep sending updates and peptalks and I still feel like I'm committed to it even though I hate what I've been writing and it's hard. From the emails, it seems like that is not only normal, but pretty much an epidemic. And hearing that actually helps.

I'm happy to hear that you are enjoying living in the city not and the difference between that and home. It's nice that you have a balance of both, since as we know and discouragingly told our Scandinavian friends, the city can wear you down. It's also nice that you're starting to think in terms of staying in the city when that works for you. Good for you! You go Glen Coco! (P.S. I read something about how Glen coco is a real person. He's a film editor named Glen Cocco. You have to imagine introducing himself to people gets kind of annoying now and then. I think it's hilarious)

Perhaps if I start a blog, I can incorporate these stories from people. That is one of the fun things about travel anyway. I know I keep talking about starting a blog, so thanks for bearing with me for like, 2 years? It's a lot of work and I just keep thinking Ugh, but it is something I want to do, so perhaps after NaNoWriMo. Right now I'm thinking that we both really like 'Snarky,' so maybe I'll just do Snarky Explorer and forgo the alliteration.

I wish you could see the crazy acrobatics Hannah and Max are doing right now. She is standing upright on his palms and he is lifting her as she balances. It's like watching baby Cirqe du Soleil. Which is something that should probably exist. Here is another picture.