So I realize its been a ridiculous amount of time since this post has been pending so I apologize for that. Especially after I was all wah wah wah about you not posting so fair to say Monisha has learned her lesson. This reminds me of this time freshman year when I had this phase where I kept referring to myself in the third person. That was weird. Pretty much in line with the phase I had where I did yoga every morning or when I listened to classical music while I was studying. I go through these things sometimes.
Anyways I hope you had a great thanksgiving ( I realize you probably did since you love all the food)/subsequent week. I feel like last time I wrote in bowl I was going through a low so you will be glad to know I have since risen out of that low. Not to say that all those things I was feeling that week wasnt real. Moving out is still hard and I am still getting used it. But its really a wonder how much warmer weather and more sleep can brighten your perspective. Makes me wonder what Im doing on the east coast but then again Ive really been loving all the holiday cheer in nyk lately.
My thanksgiving was good..we went to Maryland and then all 5 of us went to pittsburg so it was lots of driving but it was nice to not be doing anything and it was even nicer to not be doing anything with family. You were right about how its great that its my sister who is having the baby ( I mean aside from the obvious reasons why) because now I can do all these weird things that I would never be able to do with anyone else. Like touch her stomach at random times or listen to it (we heard some glug-glug noises! aah!). I still you remember you telling me about how it was so weird that there was an alien growing inside your sister and at the time I was like it's a baby Jenna but now I completely understand what you mean. Like yes its this thing youre used to hearing about and seeing it with other people but when its happening so close to you its like mindblasting and so hard to wrap your head around.
I am so envious of your dreams. I never seem to have dreams that occur in different locations. And seriously about the Norway thing I mean we didnt even see Stavanger! Have I mentioned that before...
But seriously your dream sounds hilarious and dream Jenna sounds perfectly logical.
I think I often tend to not give myself credit for the things I have accomplished because I tend to live way more in the future than I do in the past. I mean I know youre not supposed to do either but who can help these things really. And so to me if ive already done/accomplished it then its just no big deal and on to the next. So while yes I realize that at the beginning of this year moving out was only something I hoped to do and now Ive actually done it, its like I progress on to thinking about it as though Ive always not lived at home if that makes any sense. What you said about allowing myself to feel all the feelings does make a lot of sense though because I often tend to get impatient when I feel i am in a funk and just want to do things to fix it. But sometimes you dont need to fix, you need to process.
I have started decorating my room and it definitely does help make it feel more like my room and a place I belong and not just a place I am staying. Ive also insulated my windows so that really helped too. I also have to tell you that I have started sleeping the other way on my bed. The first time I did it felt wrong. But now it feels...slightly less wrong.
I think something else I really need to be better at is accepting and owning my choices. Normally this is easy to do because the people I choose to spend time with are supportive of the things I do. But sometimes when Im talking to a work friend or someone who doesn't necessarily know me well then it gets hard because I feel like my life needs to make sense to them for me to be friends with them. But really my life doesn't have to make sense to anyone but me and those heavily invested in my life.
So as for the job I finally found a way to reach out to them where I would get firm responses and unfortunately I did not get either one. So one of them (the goldmann one) all it took was me to reach out to the HR lady and she was like oh sorry we decided not to move forward and I was like ok thats a bummer but fine. The other one (at my own company) I reached out to the HR lady multiple times and she avoided me like the plague. Finally I decided to reach out to the hiring manager because I knew he would respond to me and he got back to me within the day with a very nice email saying how while I was wonderful and he wishes he could have hired more than 1 person, unfortunately he could not and had to go with someone who had more marketing experience than I did. This kind of made me go through a rollercoaster of emotions because this was the first job in my whole process that I really wanted. To be honest I wonder why I didnt just reach out to him sooner. Maybe I felt like there was a small chance of me getting it but really after 3.5 weeks of no word I kind of already knew that I didnt. In any case Im glad I did because it was important to me to get a firm answer and actually hear it from someone so I could get closure and move on from it. On the one hand I really am grateful I got the chance to interview for the job because I met such great people and learned so much just from talking to them. And really I got so close to getting a job I actually wanted (like literally runner up) which has to mean Ive made progress in some sense. On the other hand...I got SO CLOSE. And now that I didn't get it in a lot of ways it feels like Im back at square 1 and like getting rejected from this job has not made me any closer to getting a job I actually want. I try to focus on the first perspective because ultimately I have to. I have to believe that there is a job out there for me and that if I keep trying I will get it because well what other choice do I have? Like in this situation the reason for me not getting it really was not in my hands since I cant magically conjure up marketing experience so its really like you said about finding someone who will believe in me enough to give me a chance. I know someday all of this will make sense and I will be able to see why. For now Im just trying to have patience.
Funny you should mention Serial because you're right it has been everywhere lately. I will start it. The downside of not commuting is that I dont ever get time to read or listen to podcasts unless I actually make time for it so now Im attempting to make time for it.
So thats pretty much the whole story (have you been watching New Girl?). Its hard to believe the year is almost over! I keep not making plans for January because in mind thats a long time away even though its really next month. Thats really going to bite me in the butt come January. Also I did want to take a trip early next year so thats another thing I really have to plan. Considering I make travel such a big part of my life its really a wonder I dont book my trips way in advance. Like really Im just throwing money away by not doing it. Get your head in the game Monisha sheesh. Ok I think Ive come full circle now so I will say adieu.
Anyways I hope you had a great thanksgiving ( I realize you probably did since you love all the food)/subsequent week. I feel like last time I wrote in bowl I was going through a low so you will be glad to know I have since risen out of that low. Not to say that all those things I was feeling that week wasnt real. Moving out is still hard and I am still getting used it. But its really a wonder how much warmer weather and more sleep can brighten your perspective. Makes me wonder what Im doing on the east coast but then again Ive really been loving all the holiday cheer in nyk lately.
My thanksgiving was good..we went to Maryland and then all 5 of us went to pittsburg so it was lots of driving but it was nice to not be doing anything and it was even nicer to not be doing anything with family. You were right about how its great that its my sister who is having the baby ( I mean aside from the obvious reasons why) because now I can do all these weird things that I would never be able to do with anyone else. Like touch her stomach at random times or listen to it (we heard some glug-glug noises! aah!). I still you remember you telling me about how it was so weird that there was an alien growing inside your sister and at the time I was like it's a baby Jenna but now I completely understand what you mean. Like yes its this thing youre used to hearing about and seeing it with other people but when its happening so close to you its like mindblasting and so hard to wrap your head around.
I am so envious of your dreams. I never seem to have dreams that occur in different locations. And seriously about the Norway thing I mean we didnt even see Stavanger! Have I mentioned that before...
But seriously your dream sounds hilarious and dream Jenna sounds perfectly logical.
I think I often tend to not give myself credit for the things I have accomplished because I tend to live way more in the future than I do in the past. I mean I know youre not supposed to do either but who can help these things really. And so to me if ive already done/accomplished it then its just no big deal and on to the next. So while yes I realize that at the beginning of this year moving out was only something I hoped to do and now Ive actually done it, its like I progress on to thinking about it as though Ive always not lived at home if that makes any sense. What you said about allowing myself to feel all the feelings does make a lot of sense though because I often tend to get impatient when I feel i am in a funk and just want to do things to fix it. But sometimes you dont need to fix, you need to process.
I have started decorating my room and it definitely does help make it feel more like my room and a place I belong and not just a place I am staying. Ive also insulated my windows so that really helped too. I also have to tell you that I have started sleeping the other way on my bed. The first time I did it felt wrong. But now it feels...slightly less wrong.
I think something else I really need to be better at is accepting and owning my choices. Normally this is easy to do because the people I choose to spend time with are supportive of the things I do. But sometimes when Im talking to a work friend or someone who doesn't necessarily know me well then it gets hard because I feel like my life needs to make sense to them for me to be friends with them. But really my life doesn't have to make sense to anyone but me and those heavily invested in my life.
So as for the job I finally found a way to reach out to them where I would get firm responses and unfortunately I did not get either one. So one of them (the goldmann one) all it took was me to reach out to the HR lady and she was like oh sorry we decided not to move forward and I was like ok thats a bummer but fine. The other one (at my own company) I reached out to the HR lady multiple times and she avoided me like the plague. Finally I decided to reach out to the hiring manager because I knew he would respond to me and he got back to me within the day with a very nice email saying how while I was wonderful and he wishes he could have hired more than 1 person, unfortunately he could not and had to go with someone who had more marketing experience than I did. This kind of made me go through a rollercoaster of emotions because this was the first job in my whole process that I really wanted. To be honest I wonder why I didnt just reach out to him sooner. Maybe I felt like there was a small chance of me getting it but really after 3.5 weeks of no word I kind of already knew that I didnt. In any case Im glad I did because it was important to me to get a firm answer and actually hear it from someone so I could get closure and move on from it. On the one hand I really am grateful I got the chance to interview for the job because I met such great people and learned so much just from talking to them. And really I got so close to getting a job I actually wanted (like literally runner up) which has to mean Ive made progress in some sense. On the other hand...I got SO CLOSE. And now that I didn't get it in a lot of ways it feels like Im back at square 1 and like getting rejected from this job has not made me any closer to getting a job I actually want. I try to focus on the first perspective because ultimately I have to. I have to believe that there is a job out there for me and that if I keep trying I will get it because well what other choice do I have? Like in this situation the reason for me not getting it really was not in my hands since I cant magically conjure up marketing experience so its really like you said about finding someone who will believe in me enough to give me a chance. I know someday all of this will make sense and I will be able to see why. For now Im just trying to have patience.
Funny you should mention Serial because you're right it has been everywhere lately. I will start it. The downside of not commuting is that I dont ever get time to read or listen to podcasts unless I actually make time for it so now Im attempting to make time for it.
So thats pretty much the whole story (have you been watching New Girl?). Its hard to believe the year is almost over! I keep not making plans for January because in mind thats a long time away even though its really next month. Thats really going to bite me in the butt come January. Also I did want to take a trip early next year so thats another thing I really have to plan. Considering I make travel such a big part of my life its really a wonder I dont book my trips way in advance. Like really Im just throwing money away by not doing it. Get your head in the game Monisha sheesh. Ok I think Ive come full circle now so I will say adieu.
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