Wow that most definitely deserved a bowl post so Im glad it got one. That's a lot of crazy things to happen at once so first let me say that I know youre probably feeling overwhelmed but I really do think everything happens for a reason so hang in there. It will all make sense at some point.
Now on to the actual things. The bed bugs thing doesn't surprise me as a general issue since bedbugs are a problem many people face in the city. I think my roommates actually had them the year before I moved in and had to get the place exterminated so yea it happens. It is a funky coincidence that it would happen during your sublet forcing you to move back home but in a way it did seem like all signs were pointing to you not being in the heights. I dont think it was a mistake per se...more like a trial run for something that is to come. I definitely do believe in signs and this does seem like a big one but I would say don't let it discourage you because to me it seems like a positive sign. I dont know why but for some reason it seemed like you were settling with the heights and thats not what you deserve. I think when you do move out its going to be an awesome thing which you will be very excited about and something that is going to end up being a very positive thing in your life.
I do think to a certain extent not being home will always feel weird. Its been almost a year for me and it still feels weird. It feels like I belong at home and Im just pretending to live in the city. I know though that I was meant to move out at the time I did and that while there will always be growing pains ultimately I made the right choice for me. But that doesnt make it any easier to come back from home after the weekend is over.. ( I like how Im telling you this as Im supposed to be making you feel better about being back at home but what can I say in a weird way Im jealous).
I do completely understand about the trip having snuck up on you though. As much as I love traveling and seeing new places I feel like trips ALWAYS sneak up on me. Before you know it youre scrambling to pack and plan things last minute and wondering why you would ever want to leave home but ultimately that also adds to the awe of being in a new place and thinking hey I actually did this.
I hope thats how it is for this weekend ( Im going to Arizona did I tell you?). I originally just asked Ela on a whim because I wanted to go to Zion and it somehow ended up working out with dates so I booked it but now im feeling really meh about it partially because originally I thought I would be planning a lot of it but now her friends are also coming and as they all know each other it seems like their trip with me just tagging along. Also my sister is coming to NJ this weekend (baby's first trip out of state!) and Im sad to be missing that even thought I know I just saw her like 2 weeks ago but still. I know all this is just me being stressed out for no reason Im sure I will go and have a great time but still cant help but feel meh at this point. So yea I really get what you are saying about not having everything booked and planned but as you said that is part of the adventure. You can be like those girls who laughed at us in the airport before going to Norway...
The whole thing about Coby is incredibly bizarre. I dont even really know what to say about it except that its incredibly bizarre but yes I completely get why you would be bursting during that conversation.
Other than what I mentioned before Im doing alright. Its weird because just like you a year ago I was in such a different place and now Ive taken my GMATs once and work in a different team at work and live in the city. And yet sometimes I feel just as stuck and just as anxious that life is just passing me by. Maybe this weekend will help get rid of some of that. Or maybe this is just what being in your 20s feels like.
Also if Shavuot is this weekend then I will be away but if you meant next weekend then I will be around. Otherwise Im also free for dinner next week ( I leave on thursday this week so I should really pack tommorrow).
Now on to the actual things. The bed bugs thing doesn't surprise me as a general issue since bedbugs are a problem many people face in the city. I think my roommates actually had them the year before I moved in and had to get the place exterminated so yea it happens. It is a funky coincidence that it would happen during your sublet forcing you to move back home but in a way it did seem like all signs were pointing to you not being in the heights. I dont think it was a mistake per se...more like a trial run for something that is to come. I definitely do believe in signs and this does seem like a big one but I would say don't let it discourage you because to me it seems like a positive sign. I dont know why but for some reason it seemed like you were settling with the heights and thats not what you deserve. I think when you do move out its going to be an awesome thing which you will be very excited about and something that is going to end up being a very positive thing in your life.
I do think to a certain extent not being home will always feel weird. Its been almost a year for me and it still feels weird. It feels like I belong at home and Im just pretending to live in the city. I know though that I was meant to move out at the time I did and that while there will always be growing pains ultimately I made the right choice for me. But that doesnt make it any easier to come back from home after the weekend is over.. ( I like how Im telling you this as Im supposed to be making you feel better about being back at home but what can I say in a weird way Im jealous).
I do completely understand about the trip having snuck up on you though. As much as I love traveling and seeing new places I feel like trips ALWAYS sneak up on me. Before you know it youre scrambling to pack and plan things last minute and wondering why you would ever want to leave home but ultimately that also adds to the awe of being in a new place and thinking hey I actually did this.
I hope thats how it is for this weekend ( Im going to Arizona did I tell you?). I originally just asked Ela on a whim because I wanted to go to Zion and it somehow ended up working out with dates so I booked it but now im feeling really meh about it partially because originally I thought I would be planning a lot of it but now her friends are also coming and as they all know each other it seems like their trip with me just tagging along. Also my sister is coming to NJ this weekend (baby's first trip out of state!) and Im sad to be missing that even thought I know I just saw her like 2 weeks ago but still. I know all this is just me being stressed out for no reason Im sure I will go and have a great time but still cant help but feel meh at this point. So yea I really get what you are saying about not having everything booked and planned but as you said that is part of the adventure. You can be like those girls who laughed at us in the airport before going to Norway...
The whole thing about Coby is incredibly bizarre. I dont even really know what to say about it except that its incredibly bizarre but yes I completely get why you would be bursting during that conversation.
Other than what I mentioned before Im doing alright. Its weird because just like you a year ago I was in such a different place and now Ive taken my GMATs once and work in a different team at work and live in the city. And yet sometimes I feel just as stuck and just as anxious that life is just passing me by. Maybe this weekend will help get rid of some of that. Or maybe this is just what being in your 20s feels like.
Also if Shavuot is this weekend then I will be away but if you meant next weekend then I will be around. Otherwise Im also free for dinner next week ( I leave on thursday this week so I should really pack tommorrow).
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