I am leaving on a large plane...but not before another post!

So lately I've wanted to reply to these posts as soon as I see that you have one maybe its my competitive spirit or because in my head it feels like we are having one long conversation but either way its been nice getting to our regular posts.
And I understand that about it being awkward about telling people you're in a relationship. Maybe you just don't want to be judged and you don't know how the other person will react or how they will feel about themselves, you, the other person when you tell them. Who really knows. And good job on not thinking about yourself for a whole min! That is a big accomplishment I don't know if I wouldve lasted that long.
I totally forgot to comment on those $1 gloves that is fantastic! If only I had time to go to Target and pick myself up 3 pairs. I really could use a pair or two of gloves I never seem to have them and my hands always end up cold. Not fun I tell you. not fun.
So moving didn't end up being that bad it only took about 2 hours so it was pretty uneventful to be honest, the car ride there are back was more annoying because it felt forever. So now I'm packing up, this is kind of an awkward trip to pack for since its 3 weeks long so I know I will be doing laundry and don't need to take that many clothes but at the same time I want to have enough so I'm not just cycling between two different dresses but then again I could also just buy more when I get there which my sister and I are planning on doing anyways so...yea. And I want to take less so I can bring back more but everytime I see another one of my dresses Im like but what if I will want to wear that one? Considering I don't get to wear my indian dresses that often here even though I do get to wear them once in a while, still when will those dresses get their day in the light? I feel like I have to choose between my pokemon. You know how that feels? I'm sure you do.
Also since today is my last real day here I went to see Sally( yes she does exist!) and Ela is coming over in a little while so its nice to catch up but honestly I'm sooo ready to escape from my life for a while. I don't know what it was about this last semester but I'm just soo done. Done with classes. Done with RHA. Done with people( not you silly I'm never done with you).  And I just want to go far away and pretend like all this doesn't exist for a while. Which is perfect because I actually get to! How often does that happen?
But yea I'm also having trouble packing my carry on since I took out so many books from the library and I dont know which ones I will actually end up reading/liking so Im just taking all of them but Im afraid of losing them since they are library books but I am anyways. Im also trying to convince my sister to download harry potter on her kindle which apparently you can illegally download onto but i dont know if she will actually get around to doing that.
Im also excited for the warmish weather.
Iv been saying happy christmas today like the british do. See I told you finals week made me weirder.
This might be my last post so I will bid you adieu at this moment! I shall return, don't move on! Wait for me!
k im done being weird now.

You're leavin. On a large plane.

Hi :)

Shabbos starts in about twenty ish minutes so I have a limited amount of time but I wasn't sure if I'd get to post tomorrow night so I wanted to post again before you leave because it's apparently the only thing I can be productive at. (Thought I am now nearly caught up on four different shows...) That being said I hope today wasn't too much of a drag with all of the moving and packing and moving back and unpacking (hopefully not down to you). I have unpacked mostly except i didn't bring hangers home so my hanging stuff is... on a pile on the floor still. But the good news is that the cats have not yet gotten to it. By that I mean they have not yet elected to spread cat hair allll over it.

Yesterday my mom felt like doing something so we said maybe we would play a game and then she fell asleep on the couch after we'd been watching TV for about five minutes. Because of my boredom and the lack of sleep that comes hand in hand with going to sleep really late and waking up at ten something, I fell asleep on the couch for an hour and woke up in a foul mood and with a headache, which was unpleasant to say the least.

Allison H. stopped by today. Haven't seen her in a while so that was lovely. Plus she baked us some challah. Sweeeeet. She's seeing someone. I guess that's really the update of the day. My update for her was something like the $1 gloves (still a good deal, but you can understand why the two really don't compare). I don't know why people have to be so awkward. She practically whispered it to me, averting her eyes like she was unexpectedly slipping me top secret nuclear codes and someone had bugged my house in Queens. Is it embarrassing to tell people you are in a relationship? Is this because it's just awkward to tell people or because it's weird to be in a new relationship at all? Is it because i'm not in one? Is it because I don't know him? I don't know... I was happy for her for I think a full minute before thinking of myself. (This is significant because I think How I Met Your Mother only gives people 30 seconds- so it proves my selflessness.) Truth is I don't see Alli that much so it affects me minimally if at all... until she starts growing up or thinking about engagement. Sigh. In any case i really am happy for her. Not sure why I'm more happy for her than I usually am for the people I know in relationships so I'll spend Shabbos over-analyzing that. TTFN Ta Ta For Now.

we are starting to lead the same life...

So I just saw your post and I'm sitting in my living room with my parents and my doesn't like it when I'm home and I'm not sitting with her as she watches tv ( I know shes insane this is where I get it from) so im just gonna write one now and maybe I will record a video later.
And omg I thought the exact same thing when watching Easy A, I thought he was on the phone with a guy for sure! That was such a good shocker. And yea during the whole thing I was just like, silly Pheobe go back to Central Perk.
I'm sad for those lost 3 min. Who knows how many laughs I couldve gotten...WHO KNOWS?! Well you do.
You did tell me those things and yes we were walking when you did, and yea I hate selecting movies in groups of people I always end up being one of those people like yea whatever I dont care but I dont think Iv seen that many movies in groups oh wait what am i talking about movie thursdays used to be a thing but most of the movies we saw were good the only down point of that was when not everyone ( by which I mean just yael) didnt like the movie and tried to convince everyone the movie was terrible just because she didnt like it. right. good times.
So tomorrow my parents and I have to go to New Haven to go help my sister move in since she is finally done with everything at Yale and is ready to leave there now. Now ofcourse my sister being herself, and kind of like you, has not packed at all so we have to go pack her up and help her move out. Needless to say I am not looking forward to this, especially because I decided to work out yest and today and now I am incredibly sore. Good times again, but hey itll just be my work out for tomorrow. And then I have to pack for myself and leave aah. Crazy.
I applied for 4 more jobs today thats actually all i did i just sat on my couch and filled out job applications. Which by the way is not fun at all they ask you all these useless questions like developments in the investment banking industry which I know nothing about and I just made stuff up again useful that Im not passionate about working in any one place.
Maybe I will watch despicable me tonight. Oh by the way Iv been catching up on Modern Family and its hilarious you should def catch up! Like there was this one episode I was literally dying they are so good. Ok I may be exaggerating a little bit but really funny you should watch. Im starting to think I watch too many shows.
Dont really know where today went. I like how you started that post like community channel. Iv been watching more of that. Shes so funny. Why arent we friends. Maybe its because I am her. Shes my alter asian ego. Just kidding thats jen. Its been hard keeping two blogs up. Anyways thats enough being weird for tongiht I will try to do a video post later...or will i?! dun dun dun. Ok lame.

We only got 4 minutes to save the world... and I took 7. FML.

Strange note: The file for this video saved as movie 5 but the last one was 18. Weird...

DAMN!!! Remember how in the last video I said sometimes photobooth doesn't record. Well it cut off 3 and a half minutes of this video. Stupid photo booth. Oh well. All that funniness lost forever.

waiting for my plane to come

Yea that’s right. Its another dramatic title. I’d like to see what you do about it. I have a lot of feelings and emotions ok?! (from the side: “she doesn’t even go here!”) ok that would’ve worked better had I said it but you get the gist…

But anyways more importantly I watched Easy A last night too!!! Omg twins. We think the same. We are the same. I am Jenna Grunfeld. Just kidding Im not. Or am I? Anyways I watched it and yea she is so pretty it was good I liked it a lot.I did not like Lisa Kudrow in it though, is it just me or is her botox just way too much to handle? Its like I cant even notice anything else I just keep thinking. Wow Lisa what happened to you. Also she had a pretty negative role in the movie so that might have something to do with it. Just sayin.

Right now Im trying to download Despicable Me from my friend Lizzie who is trying to send it through aim and I’m pretty sure its been like half an hour and its 16% done. I hope this works I really wanna see this movie. I realized yesterday that after you told me to watch it I actually dled coyote ugly so I might watch that sometime soon. Or will I? You never know. I keep you on your toes like that.

I would do a video post too but I dunno if I can figure out how to do it and then post it in the blog. Im sure I can if I tried.Maybe I will one day…yet another surprise in store for you. I’m trying to keep the fire alive in our relationship. Let it burn. Im extra weird tonight. Maybe its my weirdness from finals carrying over. Im becoming a socially awkward person Jenna..oh no I knew this day would come. I had just hoped it wouldn’t come so soon.

So I tried applying to jobs today and ofcourse got overwhelmed. I wrote 2 cover letters though by which I mean I wrote one and changed the company’s name and I know they tell you not to do that but frankly im lazy and there isn’t really any one job which I really really want to get I just want a job which is probably not the best mentality to have in the first place but to all this I say…meh.

I got a B in the class I got the 37 exam grade in. Its still my worst Iv never gotten a B in a class before but really im ok with it because I was expecting much worse and iv resigned myself to this. Its really a miracle that I even got this considering I thought I bombed the final. It’s a Christmas miracle! Speaking of which I also saw that episode of community last night and it was soo good! Love that show they are so innovative.

I guess this means I can catch up on chuck too…tear. It wont be the same but maybe the show wont even be good this season in which case its all like whatever.  You know whats weird even though it feels lik iv written a lot in this post you’ve still said more in your 4 min video than I could type out. Crazy. I hope you got milk and did your laundry and unpacked. I unpacked the night I got home because I wanted the room somewhat clean for you. If you hadn’t come everything still would be a mess. I need a really good book to read, none of the books I got out are really doing it for me. Course I haven’t tried reading a majority of them but the covers don’t interest me much. That’s right. I just judged a book by its cover. What you gonna do about that huh? Huh?! Tee hee just kidding im not angry at all. Seriously with the weirdness though.

lets try and get another one in before i leave!!!

Dramatic Titles FTW

flowers smell good

I thought I'd change it up from my usual metaphorical overdramatic statuses by stating a simple fact, or sometime fact because flowers don't always smell good sometimes they don't have a distinct smell.

But anyways I apologize for being so awful with writing in here it was mainly because I wanted to do justice to your last entry but then I thought maybe you didn't write that to elicit a response but more just to tell me in which case my reply need not have waited nearly as long. But I guess its just one of those things that really sucks that you have to deal with and what probably sucks most about it is watching someone you love go through something painful and yet not be able to do anything about it, and i dont even have to say anything about losing someone you love in that case. But anyways I'm really sorry and I hope you know I'm always here for you whenever you need anything or you dont even have to need it really you can just want it because thats ok too.

I hope you enjoyed thanksgiving, I literally did nothing. I slept till 1 on wednesday, the rest of the days I spent some quality time with my couch and bed and I saw one friend, sally the one who doesnt exist remember? except no really I saw her and I went shopping for a little bit on saturday to buy jen a present which ended by being harder than i realized.

I'm very excited to see you perform on wednesday I feel like its been a very long time since Iv seen you perform. Also i just feel like its been forever since iv seen you in general.  Oh we changed the set up of our apt since Jen and I felt like we needed a change and Tarah took luna home for thanksgiving so it was the perfect time for it. Its nice actually it was a much needed change i think. It felt cathartic in a weird way.

I feel like I have a lot to talk about but I want it to be a conversation so I guess it will have to wait until wednesday. I will leave you with a corny joke : What's a mermaid's undergarment?


An algebra.

Baby, There's a Shark in the Water

Yes, that's right. I saw your video. You two have got some moves... I don't know how much I have to say right now, but it was getting ridiculous how long it's been since the last post. I wanted to keep this consistent. Fail. Anywhoooo.

Biggest news in my life right now is that my grandfather's wife (stepgrandmother) is dying. It's sad. And I'll cry at the funeral, but I'm really bad about being upset until others around me are. My mom keeps telling me how hard it's been on Sabrina and I keep having only a sympathetic "mmm" to offer. My mom too isn't freaking out. She never really got over the fact that Lorraine isn't her mother, which like, obviously but I mean in the sense that even though Lorraine welcomed us into her family, treats us with love and kindness, has been far more a part of my life than my Nana who died when I was 3, my mother has never let herself get too close to Lorraine. I myself have never really understood grandparents at all. Two died before my parents were married. One when I was 3. And my grandfather, well, he's an interesting man.  Affection was never his strong suit I guess. He bought us nice gifts, pinched our cheeks, saw us on holidays, but I never felt that "grandparent/granddaughter" bond that my friends all seemed to have with at least one side of the family.

I sometimes wonder what it would have been like to grow up with all four of them. I think my dad's dad was a hard man probably. I don't know what kind of grandfather he would have been. He died before my cousin was born too. My cousin is ten years older than I am. He got a few years with my dad's mother before my parents were married. I've seen the pictures, heard the stories. By all accounts she was lovely. Sweet, loving, warm and affectionate. My mother really liked her. My Nana, well I'm pretty sure there are no bad stories about her. My mother was extremely close with her mother. I often say she was abnormally close with my Nana. I remember my Nana's smell, the sunkist and jelly fish that I got when I was at her house. I remember the spray air freshener dispensers in her house and the fun light switch in the room that was once my mother's. I cherish the dolls that were bought by her, but I don't really remember her at all. I think that hurts my mom. My sisters has such strong memories of her. All I have are stories. How I begged her for my American girl Molly. How I hid in the plastic blue laundry hamper after she died. I think I might remember that one actually, but it's possible that I just remember the hamper.

Growing up, I often attached myself to my friends' grandparents. The closest I ever got I think was Poppop, Allison's grandfather (and Mommom also). When poppop died last year, it was the hardest thing. Never having grandparents meant never losing them, and I had never experienced that loss. For weeks, I cried at every mention and thought of him and I hated it and my mom thought I was depressed (which is kind of a go-to thought for her anyway). I love Lorraine. I will miss her and I will be sad when she dies. But I'm afraid what emotions a funeral will bring back from last year. I always cry at funerals. I don't consider myself a person who is particularly in touch with her emotions, but when people tell those heart-crushing stories and they start to tear and their voice cracks. When people talk about their loved ones... I lose it. I don't know what it is. I don't know if the emotions are misplaced or repressed or both and not knowing that is unsettling to me. I know I said I didn't have a lot to say. I think I was wrong. Because I could keep going, but I'd really just like to stop crying before someone walks into the room and asks what's wrong.

Sorry for the sad post... 

In the eye of the hurricane

So I thought now would be a good time to write in this since I had a crazy past couple of days and tonight is my one break before things are back to crazy againt tommorrow. Aah life. I was just thinking about how I have not had any time to figure out my classes and I register like on tuesday nbd. I should do that..

But going back to your dilemma, or going there since I never went there in the first place I think that the whole city internship thing is definitely a risk, its something unlike anything youve done and youre pretty much setting yourself up for one hell of a semester. But that being said it sounds like an amazing opportunity. I think you should go with your gut, and I know thats lame and not a straight answer but at the end of the day I think you do know whats right for you as you always have and youll make the right decision. And you know I think everything happens for a reason so even if it ends up being not so ideal then its a learning experience and something will come out of it regardless.

So its a lot easier for me to think about all this when Im not crazy about things in my own life lol. Which so far so good but the future looks bleak. I cant believe how fast everything is going by, its like I have no sense of time at all anymore. The way this semester has been zooming by is complete insanity. Its like every week starts off and before I know its its thursday night. Its probabaly because my days are so packed now its just running from one place to another. And also because I dont have a school night where I have no meeting. Its been interesting and Im scared to think what next semester will be like and hell what next year will be like because for some reason that seems like an even scaries prospect. But really though, we JUST started 2010...it cant be almost over already..it just cant! yea yea what else is new.

So I was thinking when we live in london we could maybe have a cat. Iv always been against pets but Luna is really not that bad and as long as I dont have to do anything Im ok with it lol.  And can we live in a place that ends in shire, or maybe just a street that ends in shire? just a thought. Id also be ok with abbey. You think it over.

Classtime/Passtime

So I was thinking about our conversation last night. Not any of the important ones, just the one where you were trying to figure if you knew the RA I met. I was thinking about how sometimes you (people in general) assume you're going to know people because you have some peripheral mutual affiliation, but the truth is it's probably unlikely that you actually know them. As a New Yorker at Rutgers, this happens a lot to me when people know a Jew from Queens. I really just assume I'll know them even though I probably don't. And then when I don't, I don't say "Oh, that's weird, how could I not know who that is?" I say "Hm... nope, don't know her... I actually really only know about 4% of the Jews in Queens anyway." I just think that's strange.

What's also strange is how many professors preach their beliefs under the guise of teaching you to be a free thinker. I have two teachers like this at the moment, well kind of three, but the main two I'm thinking of are at opposite ends of the political spectrum (and the stupidity spectrum) anyway so I guess it balances out. What I hate is that my cognition teacher makes me so much angrier than the other professor. Because here I am, in class, writing this post and listen to him lecture about how there isn't a soul. He's entitled to his belief. According to him, I'm entitled to mine too... assuming of course that I know my opinion is wrong. Like "Think what you want, but just FYI what you think is, like, ridiculously incorrect."

I should be doing my film homework. I'm so tired though. I stayed up til 3something last night looking at classes. I think I might have figured out a way to do the internship but it means putting off math yet again (and therefore ending up taking it senior year). It means taking an online class. And it means taking an Honors seminar. I would have a 9:50 3hour on both Monday and Wednesday, a MW 1:10- 2:30 honors seminar (in the Brett Seminar room :/), and then a MW 4:30-5:50. That's 4 classes. The online class would be by appt. obviously.

• Problem A. The 3 hour on Monday is Screenwriting... It's not the Writing for television section that I thought I would take which isn't the hugest deal except I can't find a revue for the Professor- never comforting... the only way around this is the 3hour on a friday- which doesn't seem advisable.
• Problem B. Two 3 hours- also not the biggest deal in the world, but I just would like to point out that 3 hours are loooooong periods of time.
• Problem C. An Online class- what if it's a lot of work and I don't have time?
• Problem D. A film class with a screening at 6:10 on Wed. Night- We might change Kol Halayla rehearsal to Wed. night so this would leave me with approximately enough time to watch movies and maybe eat dinner before KH- just a long day- 9:50am-11pm pretty much straight. Yikes.
• Problem E. The seminar seems interesting (ish) and I do still need Honors classes, but sometimes they're more work than their worth. Animal Studies- not necessarily what it sounds like... 

But I think all of these problems are just cover-ups for the real problem: Do I really want to have an internship two days a week? Isn't it crazy to be on a 7:15 am bus in the morning for a net of probably something like $100 a week?  Will I be crazy busy all the time? Will I have time for Kol Halayla? Do I want to leave my math class for senior year? Will I be able to get all of the work done? Will I hate it?

Just for the sake of balance, here are the Pros

• No friday classes- I'm hoping this would kind of balance out the too busy thing
• Holy crap, I actually only have class two days a week
• I'll get to be in the city- I love to be in the city...
• Hopefully I'll be doing something I really enjoy with people I enjoy
• I'll be getting yet another experience from this industry- more experience gives me more of an idea of what I want or don't want to do with my life. It gives me more to think about, opens my mind up to more options for the future...

Thoughts?